I did NOT send my husband for a drive with Chicklet yesterday evening and then put Bug in the playpen with a 1/4 full container of fruit puffs and let him eat, throw, and dump them on the floor and then play with the empty container and spilled puffs while I lay on the couch like a lump beause it's my week of the month to hate being a woman.
I did NOT blow my nose on a dirty sock because I was doing laundry and the dirty laundry hamper was closer than the nearest box of Kleenex. That would be disgusting and of course I would never do such a lazy thing.
One night when hubby got home from work, he went to use the bathroom. I was cooking supper. Chicklet did NOT try to follow him into the bathroom and then come suddenly running back to my side looking grossed out and tell me, "Daddy's DISGUSTING!" When I asked my husband what he'd done, he did NOT tell me he'd told her not to follow him because he was going to go poop and it would be 'disgusting.' Oh my. Are these people really my family? Haha!
