Cancer

God is bigger than cancer. I remember when I was little, 9 maybe, and my sister who was 3 years younger would wake up screaming in the middle of the night that her legs hurt. She said it felt like little men picking at her bones. It scared me when this happened. It started happening alot. She was diagnosed with leukemia. My parents opted to go a natural route (and lots of prayer of course!) rather than chemo and my sis was cured and is now a healthy 23 year old mother of 2. When my sis was first diagnosed with cancer my mother had all of us tested. My mom had ulcerative colitis and was bedridden all winter every year. Turns out she had pancreatic cancer as well. I used to get these weird shooting headaches that felt like searing hot lightning shooting up the back of my neck and skull. Turns out I had a sarcoma of the brain. It's a good thing mom wanted us all tested. My dad and little brother were fine. Well my mom and I were healed like my sister was and live to tell the tale. We could have easily all lost the battle or it could have been overlooked until it was too late.
Now my mother has cancer again. She has breast cancer and has been fighting it for about 8 years. The thing I have to remind myself of when thinking about my mom dying and what if my sister's cancer comes back or mine does or my children get cancer... I remind myself that God is bigger than cancer. If He wants to take my mother home then I can't do anything about it and no doctor or treatment in the world can either. And if he wants her to be healed then the fact that she has a hole eaten out of her chest by cancer and tumors all over inside her does not matter. GOD is BIGGER than cancer. God can take my mother and make her whole and new again. Or he can take her HOME to heaven where she will never cry, never be afraid, never be in pain again. She will bask in Jesus' love and live forever whole and healed in paradise.
I'm not going to lie to you. It's not OKAY with me if God takes my mom home. I won't be okay and I definately will have some serious issues with accepting it. In my mind He needs to heal her HERE and NOW. I need her. We all need her. I want my children to know Grammie. I want them to remember her. I want to spend many more happy Christmases with her. I don't want to lose her and when I think about that possibility I have a hard time keeping myself together. If I'm still blogging when I lose someone dear to me, you're probably going to see a side of me you don't want to know. Or I will go missing because I'm too brokenhearted to blog. But I have to keep on reminding myself that God is bigger. God can heal her and if He does not then I need to remember that she is in paradise and that she IS healed. It may not be the healing we all want, but we all die someday, and when we do, if we have a personal relationship with our creator, then we will live forever in heaven with no more tears and no more pain. And I WILL see her again, someday my own children will meet her, and we will all be together celebrating CHRISTmas for eternity.
Only God knows the future. In the meantime, I will continue to ask God for a miracle, for an earthly healing for my mother. Because God is bigger than cancer, and He can do anything.

It's finally happened: Toddler Tales Tuesday

Wednesday September 30th it finally happened. What I've been waiting for. Bug (13.5 months old) started WALKING!!! He just stood up about 2 feet in front of me and wobbled two steps toward me before falling into my arms giggling. He was so proud of himself! Hooray for my sweet Buggie walking! I'm just so proud of my sweet boy! :) He's been practicing ever since.

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If you have a sweet, cute, or funny Toddler (or kid) story, I'd love it if you'd share it here in the comments! :)

If you would like to post a Toddler Tales Tuesday on your blog, please just leave a link back to my blog in your post so people can see where you got the idea. You may leave a link to your post in my comments on the condition that you also post a comment! No link-and-runs please! ;) (I am still figuring out basic blogging so this will have to do until I am experienced enough to attempt a Mr. Linky or something.)

My Failings and His Grace

My husband was away on business last week 9/29 through 10/1 and I was here with the kids during that time. They were acting out terribly because Daddy was gone. I had that burn accident and was in alot of pain and I found myself yelling at the kids a few of the many times when they were being difficult. Then I would be so angry at myself for yelling at the kids in my anger! It feels terrible to lose your temper doesn't it? And of course it doesn't help the kids at all when I yell at them. I did not cuss at them or degrade them with my words, but the volume and tone of my voice was plenty to cause damage.
When I'm at the end of my rope, there is only one thing that can get me through without losing my temper. Even the best laid parenting intentions can fail without the Rock to lean on. When I started praying my way through, I found that He gave me the strength to control my temper so I could correct and redirect my sweet babies with a gentle tongue. Sometimes I was praying nonstop literally and then would go have a private cry during naptime, but He got me through it. I don't want to fail Him either.
Do you feel like you're about to lose it some days? Want to pull out your hair and scream? Feel guilty for yelling or snapping at your family? Take your overburdened heart to the Creator and get a refill of peace and love! Corrections made in love teach lasting lessons, corrections made in anger create lasting hurt. Jesus wants to give you the grace to correct in love. After all, your children were a gift from Him and He loves them even more than you do.

Halloween - Part 1: Jack-O-Lantern, Jack the Smith, Stingy Jack

Today in Halloween history we will be studying the origins of the Jack-O-Lantern.

The Jack-O-Lantern began with an Irish legend. So goes the legend there was a man named Jack who was a blacksmith. He was a stingy drunkard and a con-artist. Smooth and silver-tongued it was said he could talk anyone into anything. (For more information, Wikipedia "Stingy Jack".) The Devil heard about Jack and was curious and jealous of his reputation so the Devil went to find him. Some versions say the Devil came to Jack in a bar. Some say Jack met the Devil along a deserted road, and some say Jack came across a body with an evil grin in the path at night on his way home and from there took Jack to the bar to get him drunk enough to kill him. All agree that they were at one point in the pub. Jack requested to have one more drink, or several, or the Devil convinced him to drink more. Jack asked the Devil to pay his tab in exchange for his soul and the devil turned himself into a coin to pay the tab, assuming once it was paid he would turn back into himself and walk out of the bar, but instead of paying with the coin, Jack put it in his pocket with a crucifix to prevent the Devil from returning to his natural form. Jack made a bargain with the Devil to release him if he promised not to come for Jack's soul for another ten years.
Ten years after that the Devil found Jack out walking and informed him it had been 10 years and it was now time to relinquish his soul. Jack was like, 'Oh okay. But could I have an apple first? I'm starving and since I'll be starving through eternity in Hell, at least let me have one last apple before I go!' So the devil climbed up a tree by the road to get Jack his last apple and Jack carved a cross in the tree trunk or laid crosses around the tree so that the Devil would be trapped in the tree. He made the Devil promise never to take his soul to hell.
Jack's lifestyle caught up with him and Jack found himself dead at the Pearly Gates where he was refused entrance to Heaven due to his wicked life. So Jack's soul wandered down to Hell where the Devil reminded him he cannot enter there either. Jack asked, "Then where am I to go?" and the Devil replied, "Back where you came from!" The Devil sent him on his way with a coal from Hell to light his way, which Jack held in a hollowed out turnip. Jack's homeless soul wanders the earth with his coal-in-a-turnip lantern, looking for a home.

Due to this legend, Jack's Lantern or Jack O' Lantern came to be used to describe a strange light flickering over the marshes of Ireland. If approached, the light was always just out of reach. The mysterious occurrence is also known as will o' the wisp and ignis fatuus, Gaelic for 'foolish fire.' It was said that it was Jack's soul wandering, looking for a home.


READ MORE...
Part 2: Origins - All Hallows Eve, All Saints Day
Part 3: How it all ties in, Christian response
Part 4: My Personal Beliefs